my joyful heart.

  • Seeing the sunrise
  • Saluting the sun
  • Flowers sent
  • Flowers received
  • Committing to extreme self-care
  • Rededicating
  • Going within
  • Letting go
  • Forgiving
  • Realizing
  • Sushi for dinner
  • A special delivery
  • Filling one journal
  • … starting another
  • Puppy hugs
  • Kitty kisses
  • Wonderful people all around me
  • Connections
  • Blessings
  • Seeing the sunset
  • Making someone’s day
  • Love… inside and everywhere.

This has been my day, my “Personal New Year”.

One year ago today, I had open-heart surgery at age 32 to repair a life-threatening aneurysm.  It all happened so quickly but today – today especially - I see how far I’ve come, how much good is inside me, how blessed and grateful I am and how much I have to offer this world, so much still to do.  The universe realized this and saw to it that I survived, that my heart was repaired and kept beating.  I don’t know what all I still have to do or want to do or what the Universe has in store for me but I’m realizing and learning and discovering.  Slowly, sometimes painfully. 

Always gratefully.   

Project Backsplash

As many of you know, I recently bought a house.  An old house.  A fixer-upper house.

But, it is a wonderful little house with TONS of potential and I feel that it is moving at a nice pace toward that potential.

So, what is Project Backsplash then? 

Well, this is a picture of my (very torn apart at the moment) kitchen:

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If you can look past the mess that you see, you will notice MANY very beautiful cabinets. My wish is to put a tile backsplash from the cabinet-top to the underside of the cabinets. Lots of tiles will be needed for this, needless to say.

So, I’m asking all of you out there to send me a tile. That’s right, send me ONE tile, or several tiles! Just send tile! The only criteria is that it be 4 inches by 4 inches (10.16 cm x 10.16 cm). Besides that… have fun! Any color, design, patina, texture, etc. Just a 4 x 4″ tile. That’s it. Period. My hope is to have a lovely eclectic, mish-mash backsplash from all over the world! So… Please send me a tile!

This, then, is Project Backsplash!

Send tiles to:

Zazazu – Project Backsplash
P.O. Box 373
Corinth, MS 38834

And feel free to share the word about Project Backsplash with your friends!

Until next time… I’m needing some zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz’s!

Things I Love Thursday

Welcome to the first installment of Zazazu’s Things I Love Thursdays, brought to you courtesy of galadarling.

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Let us begin… but where to begin?  Ah…

1.  Beautiful custom-covered literary classics like Wuthering Heights

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2.  The promise of Spring around the corner and new Spring-y clothes…

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3.  My evening cup of chai… it is like a constitutional for me…

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4.  Facebook status updates that use quotes by L.L. Cool J.  ‘Nuff said.

5.  Amazing vintage shoes… even if they aren’t my size…

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6.  Learning new things… Like at the grant-writing workshop I’m attending this evening.

7.  Daily emails from my best friend… my rock, my sanity, my lifeline.

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What are you loving today?

 

These boots are made for walking… What else?

Attention fashion forward friends!  I recently bought these amazing bootlets as a gift-to-me but find myself wondering what to wear them with.  I will say that I don’t “do” leggings and I can’t wear jeans to work.  So, help me with some outfit suggestions here, please!

Fabulous.

Fabulous.

Hot.

Hot.

Divine.

Divine.

Vogue.  Strike a pose.

Vogue. Strike a pose.

Frost from fire…

My love for Linton is like the foliage in the woods. Time will change it, I’m well aware, as winter changes the trees – my love for Heathcliff resembles the eternal rocks beneath – a source of little visible delight, but necessary.

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I love my murderer--but yours! How can I?

Sometimes I can’t imagine anything more beautifully written as passages like this, passages from Wuthering HeightsWuthering Heights is one of my all-time favorite novels.  I read it first when I was very young, several times since and am craving to read it again.  Nothing compares to it; it is the quintessential Gothic love story.   Indeed, it is perhaps even the quintessential love story, period.

When reading Wuthering Heights, I’m often amazed that a clergyman’s daughter, a woman who was never married, could have concocted such an amazing story of love that transcends – literally – everything. 

And I pray one prayer–I repeat it till my tongue stiffens–Catherine Earnshaw, may you not rest as long as I am living; you said I killed you–haunt me, then! The murdered DO haunt their murderers, I believe. I know that ghosts HAVE wandered on earth. Be with me always–take any form–drive me mad! only DO not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you! Oh, God! it is unutterable! I CANNOT live without my life! I CANNOT live without my soul!

I love my murderer--but yours! How can I?

Terror made me cruel...

 If all else perished, and he remained, I should still continue to be; and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the universe would turn to a mighty stranger: I should not seem a part of it.

I will admit that I’m very picky about film adaptations of my beloved classic works of literature, particularly ones as powerful and soul-consuming as Wuthering Heights.  I’ve not yet seen a truly good, accurate version of it and doubt that I ever will.  It simply cannot be done; film is not and never will be literature.  In this case, actions do not speak a thousand words. 

That being said, I will say that the recent Masterpiece Theatre version was immensely enjoyable.  The scenery is just amazing: the moors are everything I would imagine them to be and the setting for the Heights and the Grange are seemingly perfect.  And, the cast in this version is about as close to what is in my mind as I think is possible, particularly Heathcliff.  Tom Hardy does a brilliant version.  He is not Heathcliff – no one is or can be – but he plays him nicely.  Cathy and Nellie are also very good, I think.

However, I will also say that this version includes several glaring inaccuracies and even more subtle ones.  There are things that I can’t imagine being included in the film, things that are so removed from how it was in the book that it almost seems a bit disrespectful.  So, there is that.

But, all-in-all, it is a beautifully done film that is just fun to watch and, even with its inaccuracies, it is a brilliant story to wrap yourself up in.  It doesn’t consume the soul like the book does but it will completely captivate you while it lasts and for a time afterward too. 

It is well worth owning.  I’m planning it for a Happy Valentine to me.  ♥

Wuthering Heights on DVD

Wuthering Heights on DVD

Buy it here.

Nelly, I am Heathcliff! He’s always, always in my mind: not as a pleasure, any more than I am always a pleasure to myself, but as my own being.

It would degrade me to marry Heathcliff now; so he shall never know how I love him: and that, not because he’s handsome, Nelly, but because he’s more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same; and Linton’s is as different as a moonbeam from lightning, or frost from fire.

Disclaimer:  My advocacy of this version has absolutely nothing to do with Tom Hardy being an amazingly stunning hunk of burning love.  Okay, his being an amazingly stunning hunk of burning love HELPS but my heart truly does belong to the story. 


Blogging to Benefit Animals

From January 13 to February 3, 2009, musician Neko Case is pre-releasing a downloadable single called “People Gotta Lot Of Nerve” but with an awesome added bonus.

Neko Case & Friend

Neko Case & Friend

Neko Case and ANTI- will make a cash donation to the amazing Best Friends Animal Society, possibly best known for being the shelter facilty that runs Dogtown and has taken in 22 of the abused former fighting dogs from the Michael Vick dogfighting ring case. For every blog that posts reposts the single, five dollars ($5!) will be donated to the Best Friends Animal Society.  Alternately, for every user of iLike that adds the song to his/her profile, one dollar ($1!) will be donated to Best Friends Animal Society. The Vick dogs, and literally hundreds of other abused animals are cared for every day, rehabilitated and when possible, adopted into loving home because of the fantastic & dedicated work of the people at Best Friends Animal Society.

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Catworld

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Dogtown

Download the song and enjoy!  Have a blog??  Please post about this limited time donation and add this download to your blogs.

Download “People Got A Lotta Nerve” here: http://http://www.anti.com/media/download/708

And for instructions on how you and your blog can help, go here. It’s SUPER easy!

♥ Home Sweet Home ♥

Two posts in one day, readers.  But, I had to post again and share my wonderful and exciting news…

I’m a homeowner!  Me.  Myself.  A homeowner.

I signed 32 times today (we counted) – which is neat because I’m 32 years old! – and the deed and keys are now MINE!

Here is my cute little bungalow:

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Officially and legally MINE!  I’m still getting used to the idea.

I was asked today how I feel now.  Let’s see… Among my many emotions…

Happy.
Overwhelmed.
Responsible.
Adult.
Hungry.
Excited.
Accomplished.
Proud.
Broke.
Nervous.
Scared (just a bit).
Content.
Glad.
Lucky.
Grateful.
Appreciative.
Rewarded.
Independent.
Vivacious.
Insomniatic.
Freewheeling.
Self-sufficient.
Delighted.
Eager.
Shocked.
Stylish.
Sleepy.
Thrilled.
Enthusiastic.
Elated.
Surprised.
Overcome.
Overjoyed.
Blessed.

Lots of feelings to feel in one day.  Wonderful though.  Wonderful day.

Hooray!

: dans l’amour avec l’amour :

In love with love, that is.

Historically, I’ve been the anti-Valentine’s girl.  I’ve not had a beau for as many V-Days as I can recall and just don’t like over-commercialized anythings whose main tenants are chocolates, bows, bears and roses.

Ew.

But this year… this year is different.

No friends, I have no beau (thank goodness) but I’ve come to see V-Day in a new light, through my own special rose-colored glasses, if you will.  Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be about the pre-determined things set forth by an over-zealous marketing industry with colossally bad taste.  No friends, V-Day can be about anything you want it to be about.

In fact, what all could V-Day stand for?  Let us brainstorm.

Vacation Day
V-8 Day
Vacant Lot Day
Vaccination Day (although that one is a bit droll.)
Vacuum Cleaner Day
Valium Day (anyone else particularly like this one?  No?  Just me then.)
Vagabond Day
Vague Day (except… that’s everyday for me.)
Vain Day (you’re so vain… no you are…)
Vagus Nerve Day
Valley Girl Day
Vampire Day (Edward Cullen is my Valentine.)
Vanilla Day
Vortex Vain Day (DOUBLE POINTS!)

Okay… I’m getting carried away.  The point is that you can make V-Day about anything you want it to be about.  Bears and bows be damned!

This year, my Valentine’s Day is starting early.  My V-Day will be about style, decor and pretty interiors for my new little house.  I’m super-excited and have been positively devouring all things aesthetically pleasing.  Lucky for me, there are tons of wonderful blogs out there that are chock-full of such things; more than I can endeavor to digest in any given 24-hour period, to be sure.  And, I’ve done a bit of web-trolling and magazine-perusing on my own too.

Oh la la!

Let the fun begin!

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How much do I love this?  Clean lines with a bit of French-style whimsy and adaptable with whatever draw-pulls you want.  Perfecto!  And just $349.00?  Uh… yeah.

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Or this one?  All glass and oh-so-chic.  This looks a wee bit like a store display but could easily translate, methinks.  And at $129.00?  I’m aghast.

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This lovely is only $279.00.  Amazing.  Perhaps the title of my post should have been “In love with Ikea.”  How would that translate to French?  Hmmmmm…
I’ve also been hoping and dreaming, wishing and praying about the floors that I’ve yet to see, the pine hardwoods hidden under layers of funky carpet.  Ah… the dreams I have for them.  However, being a realist (okay, no, that isn’t true but it sounded best right there) I know that they may be in horrible shape.  The house is over 100-years-old so I needn’t get my hopes terribly high.  So, I’ve been weighing the options: refinishing or painting?  Black or white?
White hardwoods have their merit.
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However, I think I’m leaning more toward the dark side.

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And what for the walls?  Oh heavens, I don’t know.  I’ve poured over the Benjamin Moore paint book and just haven’t a clue.  Millington Gold looks good but so does Artichoke Hearts, Poppy, and Pumpkin Spice.  And what will work together?

My mind hurts.

So, I’m now thinking that I might paint the floors black, all the walls white and consider it a blank canvas for all my tchotchkes and artwork.  Although, it would behoove me to remember that I have a black cat with long hair.  Would black floors and all white walls be the smart way to go?  It works in catless, ElleDecor abodes but would it really work for me?

Who knows.  My hope is that it will all come together.  And I’m sure it will.

Oh, and before I leave it out… THIS is going to be my closet:

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Ha ha!  I wish.

In a more immediate Happy V-Day to me:

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{from DearGoldenVintage}

And finally, since I know that so many of you MUST be hopeless romantics (you’re reading this blog, aren’t you?), I think you will appreciate this.  At the very least, you recall this tome from Sex and the City: The Movie.

Ah yes, it is…

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So this year, make your V-Day anything you want it to be.  The sky is the limit!  And if you start now, you’ll have plenty of time to plan.

And just to give you ample inspiration, I’ll continue to post some of my favorite pretties here, since I’m sure I’ll come across lots in all my blog-browsing.

Until then… Be dans l’amour avec l’amour. What can it hurt?

{ Psst… Click here for a Zazazu Giveaway. }

Disclaimer:  For some reason, photo links weren’t working in WordPress for me today.  If you want to know the origins of any of these lovelies, leave a comment and I’ll let you know!

100 {more} Things…

  1. I only eat oranges at Christmas-time and only the navel ones without seeds. And lots of them.
  2. I really like pictures and paintings of trees.
  3. I believe in God but I am not religious.
  4. I make exceptionally good lasagna.
  5. And pecan pie.
  6. And macaroni and cheese (from scratch).
  7. My favorite color is chartreuse… the snotty shade of it.
  8. I don’t see the appeal of fireworks. I think they are a waste of money.
  9. I have an amber fleck in my left eye.
  10. I aspire to meditate.
  11. I want a nosering (tiny stud) in a really bad way.
  12. I’d also like to have a cropped haircut but my face isn’t the right shape. Alas.
  13. I hate going to the dentist. Nothing is worse than having hands in one’s mouth.
  14. I’ve always kind of wanted to be an actress… like strike out to Hollywood.
  15. I plan to live in New York City at some point in time.
  16. And abroad… somewhere.
  17. I sometimes wish I had really REALLY curly kinky curly hair.
  18. But, I don’t. I have heavy, stick straight hair. And that is okay too.
  19. I am the Queen of long-distance relationships.
  20. I’ve not realized when one year passed into the next (as in when it struck midnight) in at least five years.
  21. Needless to say, I don’t make it a point to be kissed on New Year’s.
  22. I love homemade, handmade clothing.
  23. To that end, I would love to be able to sew and aspire to learn that skill.
  24. At some point in my life, I want to wear a beautiful white dress. That’s why I’m thinking of trying out for Cinderella at the theatre.
  25. I always wish on stars.
  26. If a black cat crosses in front of my car, I will stop, get out, mark an “x” and spit.
  27. I love the Geico gecko. His accent is adorable.
  28. I really hate techno music.
  29. And about 95% of country music.
  30. I wish I were better with growing plants.
  31. Sometimes, when I’m in another town and by myself, I’ll speak with a foreign accent just because it amuses me.
  32. I relish sitting in cafes by myself with a book and a latte.
  33. I ‘never say never’. I think it is a jinx.
  34. I have a chronically cold right foot. A nerve was clipped during my back surgery making it always very very cold. Tragic.
  35. I look forward to the mail each and every day.
  36. (White) Christmas lights never get old to me. Ever.
  37. There are very few possessions that I won’t give if someone were to really want and / or need them. I am not easily attached to things.
  38. I am VERY attached to my cat, but she isn’t a thing.
  39. I am 100% Southern and yet I cannot STAND sweet tea.
  40. I won’t say that I never lie but if and / or when I do, it is completely unintentional. I strive to always tell truth.
  41. I’ve changed significantly in the past 18 months, in regards to what I want in life, etc., and that is surprising and a bit scary to me.
  42. I think red is a neutral color.
  43. I own way too many books. I really should endeavor to read more of them. Or develop some sort of check-out system.
  44. I would like to try my hand at bread-making, from scratch.
  45. I still use Noxema cold cream on a regular basis. And love it.
  46. I do not nor have I ever owned an iPod.
  47. I can get ready – shower, hair, makeup and everything – in 23 minutes.
  48. I am self-sufficient. If I want something, I get it for myself or go without.
  49. I like to use French phrases in everyday speak.
  50. I love yard sales – having them and attending them.
  51. I hate boats.
  52. One of my pet peeves is running out of hot water.
  53. I have a seashell collection and love it. They are so simple yet so pretty and sentimental.
  54. I never ever ever go to bed without washing my face. Ever.
  55. I like peanut butter and cheese sandwiches. Yes, I do.
  56. My front tooth is chipped. Noticeably.
  57. I don’t like to sleep on couches. Even for naps.
  58. Caffeine doesn’t really affect me. I can have a coffee one minute and go to sleep the next.
  59. I really REALLY hate glitter.
  60. And confetti. These fall into the “fireworks” category – I really don’t see the need for them.
  61. As much as I love vintage-wear, I VERY RARELY wear polyester.
  62. I would love to be more comfortable in dresses. I’m historically a pants-girl.
  63. I expect the world of myself and remarkably little of others.
  64. I love peacock feathers.
  65. I sometimes amuse myself by thinking up oxymoronic phrases.
  66. If I were rich, I’d have a massage-a-week.
  67. I sometimes wonder about any maternal instinct I might have until I’m around my nephew. It kicks in then. I would do anything in the world for him.
  68. I can’t stand the smell of daisies.
  69. I don’t like banana nut bread. Except when my sister makes it.
  70. I’ve been meant for marriage four times yet never proposed to.
  71. When I can’t fall asleep at night, I write short stories in my head.
  72. I have an opposition to wearing animal prints.
  73. I really hate scary movies.
  74. And I’m not big on animated movies.
  75. I get a photo Christmas ornament for my cat every year.
  76. I send out photo Christmas cards of me and my cat every year.
  77. I LOVE texting now that I’ve gotten into it.
  78. Probably my FAVORITE type of music is French jazz.
  79. I am the middle child.
  80. I have an addiction to instant gratification.
  81. That would explain my love of shopping and my general impatient nature.
  82. I wish I had stuck with the piano when my Mother wanted me to take lessons.
  83. I am a homebody.
  84. All of the jewelry that I wear regularly means something. The trio of tiny gold rings I wear on my thumb, the circle necklace, the small dot necklace, the tooth necklace… they all have meaning.
  85. If I were to do all that I aspire to do, I’d have to quit my dayjob. (I’m not going to do that though.)
  86. Sometimes I sing so enthusiastically when I’m driving that I make myself light-headed.
  87. I get VERY sleepy when I ride with someone else driving.
  88. I would love to be “courted”.
  89. I believe that the most extraordinary love is the simple kind.
  90. I like to find quotations to match events, holidays, etc. This amuses me greatly.
  91. I like to quote “Pride and Prejudice” whenever possible. It gets annoying, I know this.
  92. My nose is red a LOT of the time. I have no idea why this is. I’m not crazy about the phenomenon.
  93. Hunting as sport repulses me. Completely.
  94. I have a little crush on Will Ferrell. And James Gandolfini. There are reasons for both. Oddly, they are both the same reason.
  95. I really can’t stand cocoa made with water. It needs to be made with soymilk to be any good.
  96. And have LOTS of peppermint.
  97. I only started getting carsick this year. I get it bad sometimes now. Ugh.
  98. When I fly, I love to make up stories of where the other passengers are headed and why, especially if they are particularly interesting looking.
  99. I live in my head. A lot.
  100. I like to make lists. Obviously. I make these 100-things lists for several reasons. They force me to really think about things that I like, things about myself; it is a wonderful way to explore and a neat challenge. And, they are neat documentation. In ten years, I can come back and see what all has changed.
(photo from siskokid on flickr)

(photo from siskokid on flickr)

:: October to December ::

I’m shocked to realize that I’ve not posted here on my blog since OCTOBER!  Wow.  Scandal.  Do I have a good excuse?  No, not really.  My only excuse / reasoning is the same as it normally is when I lapse in writing this long (or longer): I’ve got a lot going on and simply haven’t been inclined to blog. 

Pretty plain and simple. 

But, I have had a lot going on.

I was in a play.  I started a new job.  I’ve traveled for work.  I have vamped up my Etsy store (and surpassed 550 sales!)… and the list goes on. 

And now here it is December – almost Christmas! – and I’m just now making time to write again.  And, as I sit here trying to churn out a post, I realize that, even with all the things I’ve been doing, I don’t rightly know what to blog about. 

Hohum.

I will say that I’ve been very “into” Facebook lately.  Yes, yes, I know.  I shunned it for so long, saying that I didn’t want to get into it, didn’t want another thing to log-into each day, etc. etc.  But, I’m weak and easily persuaded (apparently) and fell into the throngs of people who Facebook daily.  I wonder at the pros and cons of it.  While it seems like such a wonderful, fun, easy way to meet people and interact, it isn’t really – REALLY – interaction, is it?  You go about “friending” people you kind-of-sort-of-or-maybe-have-seen-in-the-cafe-once and then feel like a schmuck when they accept but look at you weird the next time they see you out and about.  And then you realize that you have the exact same number of friends that you had before you had so many “friends”. 

Or maybe that is just me.

I guess, to tell the truth, I’ve learned a lot lately about friends and real friends and even the type people who are capable of being friends.  I realize (have been forced to realize) that some people simply don’t  have what it takes to be a friend and yet, most of those same people expect everyone to be their friend and go to the ends of the earth for them.  I know that you must BE a friend to HAVE a friend but that goes for both parties; there is no friendship without reciprocation.

In other news…?  Actually, there is very little other news. 

My Christmas shopping is done, for the most part.   I have now only to wrap and make them all pretty, and ship the ones that need shipping.

I had the worst migraine I’ve ever had in my entire life over the weekend.  It came complete with light flashes, throwing up, nosebleed, not being able to see out of my left eye, etc.  I thought I was going to die.  Thankfully, I did not and now feel better.  However, my neck has been hurting pretty profoundly for the past several weeks – months maybe – and I can’t seem to figure out how to relieve it.  It is all very vexing, really.

So, this, I fear, is all I have to tell.  Hopefully my next post – whenever it might come – will bring more news of some sort!

Until then, dear readers…

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Browse the awesome vintage photos I have for sale in my Etsy shop:  recy.etsy.com

::: Also, I’m in the process of including a 100% upcycled cashmere line to my Etsy store.  I have a fabby black 100% cashmere cowl listed now… for only $25!   Not to be missed!  Check it out! More, including 100% cashmere legwarmers, to be listed soon! :::