Why is it that…?

I guess I see this blog as the sounding board for whatever odd and random stuff that is going on in my head.  I guess I should apologize to all of you unsuspecting readers who are subjected to this rambling that I do.

I hope my apology is accepted.

That being said, why is it that when something is revealed to you or told to you or you find out not-previously-known information, it seems so very crystal clear.  I know the old adage about hindsight and all but this is more than that.  Say, for instance, someone tells you that you have been acting in a way that might hurt someone else’s feelings.  You had not realized at all before that what you were doing might be hurtful to someone else, you were totally oblivious to it.  Yet, when some particular person steps forward, says to you that “X” is hurting someone’s feelings, it is crystal clear to you that, yes, it would be hurtful and yes, that person DID have a reason to be hurt by it.  And yet again, had you not been told, you might possibly have never realized that you were hurting someone else, someone very close to you, whether you meant to or not.

And why is it that sometimes you say something and the moment the words are off the end of your tongue you KNOW it was phrased badly or said wrongly and subject to be taken in a completely different manner than which it was intended?

Yes, yes, I know that we are all only human and I’m content with and satisfied by that most days.  But, some days it just baffles me that we can’t see things – very obvious things – before they happen, before it is too late to hurt someone.  Luckily, most times, the damage is reparable or, at least, we hope that it is.

Perhaps this is a “live and learn” thing or a “think before you speak” thing or perhaps it is just a clue that we really do have to look harder, more intently and with more understanding to really get a crystal-clear view of things.

No picture or inspiration tonight… just leaving you with my thoughts.


11 thoughts on “Why is it that…?

  1. James 1:19
    This you know my beloved brethren but everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger.

    That just came to mind after reading your post.
    Glad to read your thoughts.

  2. “We are all. Free. To do. Whatever. We want. To do.” Richard Bach, Illusions
    We will never be able to please everyone. Anyway, we always learn from the experience and eventually act as cheeky wrote above.

  3. Wonderful insight. The fact is, not very much needs to be said. And then if we do misspeak, we have at hand the only thing that ever does need to be said: sorry.
    Let the apology do its thing and leave it at that.

  4. We do what we know. and then sometimes we know different, better, so then we can do different better. It’s hard when given insight to then not turn on ourselves and use it against ourselves to judge what we didn’t know at the time.
    But to be open to seeing and then taking responsibility for what we have done, even if only because we were unaware, this is worth a lot!

  5. A few weeks ago, I was at a party with a friend who works at a TV station, and I was ripping one of their shows. The one she works on. I just didn’t know it. A total bonehead mistake. Always nice to know I’m not alone. But seriously, everyone who truly knows you KNOWS your intentions are always good. If you said something boneheaded, they know you didn’t really mean it.

  6. Great post! I know I always struggle with trying to get my thoughts out clearly, and also in a manner so that the other person knows that my intentions are good, or that it’s not my intention to hurt (that’d be just wrong!). It’s really difficult to express stuff online–you can’t type out inflections, for instance, and stuff that’s written out with all the humbleness of my heart sounds good and innocent in my mind, but might sound awful or combative to the reader! Eek! I have to remind myself that most people aren’t mind readers (good thing they aren’t! I wouldn’t want them to see that I’m imagining my dream wedding to various cute actors! Mrs. Clooney sounds lovely. I digress!)
    I think people who know you know that your heart is good and that it’s never your intention to harm. : )
    Peeps who don’t know this–She’s really nice and kind and thoughtful! 🙂
    Sorry this comment was soooo very long!!! : )

  7. Sometimes me foot is firmly planted in my mouth that I sometimes don’t know how I am able to walk the planet. Then I realize it’s a free country and sometimes being ‘nice’ is just really hard to do in certain situations. And please, don’t ever apologize for wanting to rant on your blog, afterall, it’s YOURS to rant on 🙂 We love and accept all of your writing in all of its form, that’s why we’re here!



  8. Yep SO very true! I had a very specific incident come to mind as I read this and how I would NEVER intended the way it was taken but once knowing how it was taken I couldn’t imagine feeling anything BUT hurt at what I said. (Wo. Clear as mud?) It’s crazy to think that body language and voice inflection and past experience can flavour what we say so as to be interpreted as hurtful. Poo! Life.

  9. This is odd… I just read your “Why is it that…?” post but the comments were of another entry. And then when I posted, it showed it under the other entry. Weirdness.

  10. While it is human nature to make mistakes, it is not always human nature that wants us to own up to them, especially when it is someone else pointing them out to us and not our own selves realizing it on our own. I think that it takes a really big person to be humble enough that after the anger has subsided after they are confronted owns up to them what they’ve done and tries sincerely to change.

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